“Her man is your man, He’s her man and many more too…….”

What is up with this proclaimed side chick culture? Not only as a woman of God but being a woman of class period, I cannot wrap my fur around the concept of being a side chick. For that reason, I decided to understand firsthand by speaking with women who have played that treacherous role. Having the research from the internet to accompany me along with speaking to actual former side chicks has given me a small avenue to speak on why women deliberately become side chicks. There are women who literally wait in the back seat as a side chick hoping that they will become his front row lady. One thing I’ve come to understand and it seems feasible is that side chicks have to endure patience because after all they are not the meat but rather the side dish.  Side chicks remain on the waiting list for him to call, get personal time, receive gifts and they even have to make appointments for sex. The sad shocking truth is that many or dare I say most wait in hopes that he will leave his wife or actual girlfriend to be with them. They decided to wait on the side lines as if they are watching a Golden State game in hopes to win.

Side chick problems.

Though many individuals man and women alike try hard to pass the side role off as being liberating without emotional attachments, no wife duties, monetary benefits or gifts that is not an award-winning role. There are women that told me being a side chick it is less stressful because she doesn’t have to deal with the headache that the wife does. My thoughts are of course you don’t have to deal with the good and the bad alike because he is not yours totally. You are not experiencing the reality or even half of him but bits and pieces of what he allows you to know. Many women like the lavishing perks of dinners, money, handbags or other gifts that they receive without realizing that is a low value compared to him receiving your body on the side for free. The gifts make the side chick feel special when in reality they are given to hold her in position “properly”. Women who are dedicated to fooling around with a married man tell themselves and others, “if it’s not me then it will still be someone else because men cheat”. Overall, these individuals feel a sense of power because they have apart of what belongs to another woman, they have played a part in destroying marriage vows, they possess control over a man that suppose to be committed to another woman, they often feel their inadequacies are concealed through an empty promise that has been told to them from deceitful lips. The reality is side chicks are not fulfilled inwardly and never will be no matter how bold the masquerade is glamorized. One may think playing this amateur role is comfortable, fun, a thrilling secret, beneficial, less stress because no strings are seemingly attached. Let’s be clear thrills do not last it is instant gratification and it must be uncomfortable knowing that ultimately you were not the chosen one but just the one who fulfills the “let me relieve this stress” or “quickie” roles. Overall, I have seen the table flipped on side chicks hate to be put in the position of betrayal. Some of you may be reading this speaking back to me while side eyeing me and saying, “I do not owe the wife or the girlfriend anything”. Let’s get real, how about you have that same mentality with the karma come back to visit the door of your heart, soul, and mind. God designed nothing but Kings and Queens and we have the ability to be nothing less of that therefore, respect your temple.

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